Liz’s rant: The play on words

Maybe it’s just me, but I’ve about had it with someone, somewhere, who’s decided that classic pronunciations of words should be changed – and that words once known as nouns should now be known as verbs.

For example: Let’s take the country of Chile. As far as I’m concerned, Chile is pronounced just like that warm winter stew we all know and love – you know: chilly. But apparently the earthquake shook up things enough that all of a sudden it’s become known as Chil-ay. Rhymes with Oil of Olay. And it drives me crazy.

Tied for getting on my nerves the most is another phenomena: nouns that become verbs – or verbs that are used for things that they shouldn’t be. Prime example: I hate it when someone refers to “growing your business.” I mean, come on! It’s not like you add fertilizer and water. It’s a business. Not a garden. Sure, you can expand your business or increase your sales and the like, but when someone says they’re growing their business, it’s all I can do to keep from handing them a watering can and wishing them well.

It’s not just the word “grow” though. So as we close in on Christmas, I’d like to point out the new word usages that are making blood shoot out of my eyes

Let’s examine this word: Craft. Now when I say that word, what do you think of? Probably an item of some sort. You know, a thing. Something tangible. Here’s where this good word goes bad:

• “Why don’t you craft an ornament for your friend?”

See that? It changed from a noun to a verb. Bad, bad, bad. Why can’t people be satisfied with making an ornament? (Or whatever…) Or creating an ornament? Why must we now craft a… ummm…. craft?!

And another word whose new usage is driving me out of my tree: Gift. I think of gift, and again, I see a noun. As in a person, place or thing. A gift. As in, “I got the most useful gift for Christmas!”

But some people just can’t leave well enough alone, now, can they? Oh, no. Here are several examples of gift used in other ways:

• This cute sweater can be gifted with a nice scarf.
• These certificates can take care of all your gifting needs
• You’ll impress all your friends when you gift this candle.

Plus which, when someone says they’re gifting, what I hear is re-gifting. Which is probably where this whole thing started anyway, as the politically correct way of saying, “I’m too cheap to buy you a present so I’ll give you this thing that so-and-so gave me, and no one will be the wiser.”

Notice I said “I’ll give,” and not “I’ll gift.” And just so we’re clear, I guess we all know where I stand on the whole “re-gifting” thing, too…

-Liz